And so another life lesson is learnt!

I have been blessed with my Arian character. Although hard to live with it has kept me on my toes life long, because it does not let me rest. It is always pushing me towards being a better person, someone who is balanced mind and soul, someone who is able to walk the fine line between what is the reality of a human being, and the true reality of that which is beyond us. I am talking about the energies of the Universe. I am also talking about the blending of heart (soul) and mind, and the conquering of the lower self which is governed by the mind, and the soul/ heart self, which is the higher self. In all people there is a battle between those two selves, but, in this media driven world of ours, it is the lower self which is winning in most people. This is a shame, because being governed by the lower self is not a happy experience to have, as well I know. But I am conquering this lower self, only slowly though, but at least I am winning. 

Being me is not easy. I argue with myself a lot. I am cross at myself a lot. I am critical of myself a lot. And I am glad that I do all these things. I am glad that I give myself a hard time. Why? Because by giving myself a hard time I am growing into a very wise lady. I am also finding an inner contentment and a pleasure with the simple things in life. No longer do I want to be living the life that I used to, no longer do I want to be part of the frenetic pace of modern day life. The Universe knew that I would reach this state of being in my life, which is why I was brought to a quiet corner of a foreign country to live. And one of the blessings of being me is that I can look back and see how far I have come with myself. I often say that I am a Life Traveller, which is someone who has not necessarily travelled around the World, but someone who has travelled a long way in themselves, and this I have done. It has not been an easy path to follow. Often I have found myself in situations which have cost me a lot of emotional pain, but I have fought my way through and come out the other side of those situations with a greater sense of being, a greater sense of self understanding, and most of all, a greater connectiveness with the Universe. 

I became psychic by being me, and not by reading lots of books, spending lots of money on courses, or having training from others, although I did try all of these but quickly became dissatisfied. Every time I fought through a difficult situation, which was always accompanied by much self doubt, self examination, and self criticism, I found myself on the other side of the situation with an increased portfolio of inner strength and wisdom, plus I became more intuitive, and most of all, my connectivity with the Universe became stronger. It was a long haul, and it cost me dear because I nearly killed myself by my mind putting so much pressure on my body that I went into a series of strokes. But even this was a good thing because I learnt that I can self heal, and that channelling healing is the best way to help other people through their times of crisis.

One of the downsides of being me is that other people find me difficult to cope with, because I am an individual who stands apart from the rest. I do not want this to be so, and in the past I have been made to feel inept by the way in which other people judge me, so to help them feel more comfortable with me I have tended to play the fool, act silly, be less than I can be so that others will not feel so challenged by who I am. This year of 2014 has seen a letting go of this behaviour, which was only a front anyway and not who I truly was. It has been another battle, but I am winning through...not to hide my light so that others can feel more comfortable with me, but to let that light shine and not mind if others can't cope with that because they were not needed in my life anyway, so to let them go............

I did not know that this change of myself was on its way, neither did I realise that I was going through this change of self during those many weeks, all that happened was that certain situations with other people kept coming at me which eventually ended up with me flat on my back for a few days, suffering from nervous exhaustion, heart palpitations, very minor stroke symptoms, and angina. 'Oh dear', I thought as I lay in the midst of all this physical collapse, perhaps I am going to pass over, but no, it was not my time because I am still here. So what I did do as I lay in such a feeble state, was not call the doctor and get myself shipped into hospital because that would definitely have killed me off, instead I summoned help from the Universe by asking the energies carrying the human names of Michael (who stands infront of me), Auriel (who stands behind me), Raphael (who stands on the left) and Gabriel (who stands on the right). Now I never, ever, demand or summon help from the Universe. Always I remain humble in my requests, and whenever I ask for help from the Universe I always ask that everyone else be helped as well. It is not in my nature to make a request selfishly, but this time I did, not 'asking' but 'summoning'. 

And so I became well again, and I carried on with this particular learning curve, not knowing that I was learning anything at all, just carrying on being me, trying to understand why what was happening was happening, picking the situations over and over and over again until I understood what I should do, how I should think, what needed to be done. And now I am on the other side of the learning curve, and realise that I have learnt another life lesson, although I am not entirely sure of what that life lesson actually is at the moment, but in time I shall.

But how do I know that I am through this particular learning curve? Because I was sitting in the kitchen yesterday morning, taking a short break in between jobs, and I suddenly felt my heart shift and expand, then my whole chest and upper body became filled with a radiant warm light. Wow! It was the sweetest experience, and one which I wanted to stay with forever, but I had to get on with the day, so that is what I did. But every time I did sit down the same thing happened, the most magnificent warm light came into me again, filling me up, making me want to cry with its sweetness.

What was happening? I don't know, and when I asked the Universe why they were blessing me in this way the words came, "Because the Upstairs Crew love you". (The Upstairs Crew is another name I use for the energies of the Universe). I suppose, then, that I am doing things right, that the life lessons I have been recently trying to learn I have now learnt, although I didn't think I had. That is how I know that I have got another life lesson bolted on to me. I look forward to discovering what difference that is going to make in regards to my life pathway and to my  connectivity with the Universe. Being me gives me such bonuses. 

So do not mind if you, too, find yourself difficult to live with, that you also find yourself at odds with yourself, always questioning yourself and hardly ever giving yourself peace, do not mind this but be forgiving of yourself because you are surely a Life Traveller as well. Which means that you are a treasure of a person, that you have a humbleness of self, that you have a magic about you which others may find hard to deal with, but not to mind this because the Universe is looking out for you. 

May your inner battles be glorious, may your soul rise up and be your governor, may you be one of the few who truly walk in the light. 

Vx